The other city in Tennessee

Spent a few days in Memphis this week. I didn't get anywhere near Graceland or the Big Muddy but I did get a flavor of the town. It seems like a laid-back place where people live and let live. Of course, it has a bit of a bloody history in the annals of civil rights. Hopefully, those days are behind them. I would like to go back and go down along the river (I have absolutely no interest in Graceland). Maybe later this year.

The Puzzle Palace

I got back from Washington, DC Wednesday night. Actually, the meeting I was at was in Alexandria, VA, a very cool and quaint (I hate that word but it fits here) village. Lots of little shops and restaurants, including no fewer than 6 irish pubs where you can get your Guinness on.

I did go to Washington to help lobby with the group I was in. I has never actually gone in to try to see my senators and representatives. It was quite an experience. Of course, the actual politicians were gone elsewhere, allegedly voting or doing important goverment stuff, like helping Cheney wax the waterboards or something so we met with their aides. I have to say that I was fairly impressed with the knowledge of these young men and women. They told us the position of their boss on the issues that we brought up and didn't pull any punches. We were gentle with them as we were mainly looking for information. I'm sure these underpaid staffers have to put up with a lot of bullshit.

We found out the Capitol police are on the ball. One of our party set his canvas briefcase down on a bench and stepped about 10 yards away to take a picture of us with the Capitol dome in the background. When we went back, there were three cops standing around the bench with grim looks on their faces. They advised my collegue not to do that again.

All in all, I enjoyed the visit. I couldn't help thinking that, without the bravery and self-sacrifice of the people on United Flight 93 on 9/11, I might have been looking at a blackened hole instead of the Capitol and White House. God bless all of them and may they rest in eternal peace. On this upcoming Memorial Day weekend, we should take a minute to thank all those who are responsible for maintaining our freedom. Thanks to them all. Stay safe.

Trouble on the Trinity

I fear that something bad is going to happen tonight if the Denver Nuggets sweep their series with the Dallas Mavericks. Therefore, you can be sure that I will be parked in front of the television to make sure that I don't miss a second.

This is the first year in a while that I kept up with the NBA. What is with all of the pushing and shoving? When I played basketball, you would foul out in the first 5 minutes of play if you did that. Now, you have to cause a subdural hematoma to get a flagrant foul. No wonder these guys are in a bad mood all the time. Maybe this activity explains what is wrong with Charles Barkley.

Music City

So I was in Nashville earlier this week. Cool town. If you get over there and you like a good steak, go to Jimmy Kelly's. Not easy to find but, hey, you got Google Maps, right? Make sure you get the corn cake appetizers. These are little corn pancakes about the size of the dollar pancakes you get at IHOP. I could only eat about 75 of the little suckers. They were great.

If you happen to be staying for a few days, take the NashTrash Tour. These are two old gals in a pink schoolbus who take you around Nashville while making outrageous comments. They are hilarious.

One thing, Embassy Suites - Folks don't necessarily want jazz played at nuclear volume levels while they are using the public bathroom. If you don't want folks staying in your crapper long, hire a bouncer.

Somedays, you just don't want a convertible.

Twittering can be expensive

And speaking of basketball ( which I was in case you were not paying attention), Mark Cuban, the intrepid owner of the Dallas Mavericks, was fined $25,000 by the NBA for twittering his criticism of the officials instead of just calling them stupid blind bastards, like he usually does. Isn't technology wonderful?

The Zen of Basketball

At the end of March, there are 63 teams that are sad and 1 team that is happy. There is no fair or unfair about this. It simply is. It has been for 100 years and it shall be for 100 more. One can no more change this fact that you can stop hair from growing inside an old man's ear. So do not try, little cricket.

Just a short funny:

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license. First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card with the letters '

C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'

'Can you read this?' the optician asked. '

Read it?' the Polish guy replied, 'That guy's my best friend.'

Blatantly stolen from Diana Prince at Bulletproof Bracelets http://dianaprince.blogspot.com/. Check it out. Class act for sure.

Grandpas

Here's a little Friday funny for us older folks: A little girl went to visit her grandpa. When she saw him, she ran up to him and jumped up into his arms for a hug. While he was holding her, she began to trace out the wrinkles and seams in his face. "Grandpa", she asked, "did God make you?"

"Why, yes, he did," Grandpa answered. "Did he make me, too?", the girl asked. "Yes, he made you, too, honey", Grandpa said.

The little girl replied, "He's finally getting better at it, isn't he?"

Shanghai Dave's Ginger Chicken

To honor my sweetie on Valentine's Day, I made my world famous chicken. OK, country famous. All right, all right, it's famous around the house. If you want to please your darlin' with something a little different (besides the handcuffs and velvet whip next to the bed), here is the recipe:

2 pounds of chicken breast cut into 1/2-3/4" strips
one medium zuccini
one medium onion
2 cups of sliced mushrooms
2 cans of water chestnuts
1 package bean sprouts
(You can add whatever veggies that flip your switch - tiny corn, snow peas, etc.)
1 small piece of fresh ginger root
4 tablespoons olive oil (or whatever oil you like best).
1 cup soy sauce

Thinly slice the zuke and the onion. In a wok or large heavy skillet, heat the olive oil on medium-high heat. Add one slice of chicken. When it begins to sizzle, add the rest of the chicken. Sprinkle with Nature's Seasonings or just salt and pepper.Stir quickly and evenly, letting the chicken brown on all sides. When brown, grate the ginger root coarsely and sprinkle the chicken evenly with it. Now, add 1/2 of the soy sauce and stir the chicken to coat it. Add the veggies and the remainder of the soy sauce. Stir to evenly mix the soy sauce. Cover and cook for 5-7 minutes over medium low heat. Serve over rice pilaf.

Rice Pilaf

2 tablespoons butter ( and I mean butter, not oleo)
2 cups of rice
4 cups chicken bouillion

Melt butter in heavy pan or dutch oven, over medium heat. Add rice and stir to coat it in the butter. Let sit, stirring occasionally until most of the rice is a light brown. Add the bouillion and bring to a boil, Reduce heat to medium-low and cover. Let it cook unmolested for 10 minutes then check it. If it is still watery, cook longer checking at 3 minute intervals until rice is fluffy,

Don't worry about the butter. The chicken and ginger will cancel out the cholesterol.

I hope you like this as much as I do. With a prep time of about 15 minutes, less if you buy some of the veggies and the chicken precut, and a cooking time of around 20 minutes, it's a fairly quick meal. If you have leftovers, make sure that you save all of the sauce with the rest as it will taste much better the next day. Enjoy.

Don't Mess with Old People

Just a little funny:

The IRS decides to audit Grandpa, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney.

The auditor said, 'Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable.' I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,' says Grandpa. 'How about a demonstration?' The auditor thinks for a moment and said, 'Okay. Go ahead.' Grandpa says, 'I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.'

The auditor thinks a moment and says, 'It's a bet.'

Grandpa removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops.

Grandpa says, 'Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye.' Now the auditor can tell Grandpa isn't blind, so he takes the bet.

Grandpa removes his dentures and bites his good eye.

The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Grandpa's attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous.

'Want to go double or nothing?' Grandpa asks 'I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.'

The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there's no way this old guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agrees again.

Grandpa stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can't make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditor's desk.

The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win.

But Grandpa's own attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.

'Are you okay?' the auditor asks.

'Not really,' says the attorney. 'This morning, when Grandpa told me he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and piss all over your desk and that you'd be happy about it!'

Don't Mess with Old People!!

Looking for that next dynamite investment opportunity? Look no further.

Thought for the Day

"The only reason that economic forecasting exists is to give credibility to astrology."

John Kenneth Galbraith - renowned economist

Serving Suggestion for Leftover Turkey Wings.

Juice in the Joint

I just saw on the news at lunch time that O.J. Simpson is changing his address. That's right, folks. He will be living in public housing in the state of Nevada for the next 8-33 years, depending on time off for good behavior. Of course, the man is 61 now so it's unlike he will make it for 33 years, regardless of how he acts. The judge just kept reading off charges and sentences and his face just kept falling lower and lower. I don't think that he realizes yet that he is really going to jail. I think he thinks he will get out on appeal and the judge will let him wander around free until his appeal comes up. I'm pretty sure that's not going to happen. Sorry, O.J. This time the glove did fit, they did not acquit so in a cell, you will finally sit. Buh-bye.

Sound Financial Advice

Civics 101

I am in Houston this week, working on my MILs house and getting a little rest after Las Vegas. My wife and I both voted by mail so that is all taken care of. I saw a news story on the tube yesterday on some high school kids who all showed up at school in McCain t-shirts. Nothing wrong with that except on the back was the slogan, "Obama loves Osama-BFFs". The school officials made them change clothes to avoid trouble. They talked to one of the girls wearing the shirt who said (no kidding), "I think that it is just wrong that someone who wasn't even born here can run for president". I'm so glad she got all the facts before making a decision AND that she is so familiar with the Constitution. Idiot.

Winners

Just as I am about to give up on the current generation coming out of high school, something happens that gives me hope. Last week, the students at Aledo High School in Aledo, TX ( a small town just west of Fort Worth) elected 18 year-old Kristen Pass as their homecoming queen. This is remarkable in that Kristen has Down's syndrome. Instead of going for the most popular or most attractive, these kids embraced the true spirit of inclusion and diversity, giving this young lady the thrill of her life. She has not removed her crown since. Here is a link to the story and video (I think): http://www.newsnet5.com/education/17723704/detail.html

Three cheers for Aledo. They are not all rednecks, after all.

Here's a little meme from Skylar's Dad that is kinda fun. You have to have something to say about each one word topic:

1. Clothes - usually and always at work, unless it is Naked Friday.

2. Furniture - mostly Early Marriage although we have been married 37 years.

3. Sweet - Dark chocolate in any form.

4. City - San Antonio, TX. I have been to many cities around the world but many of my happiest moments were in San Antone.

5. Drink - Casual drink is Fat Tire Amber Ale from the New Belgian Brewery in Fort Collins, CO but for serious drinking, either Grey Goose vodka and tonic or Woodford Reserve bourbon with a splash of water.

6. Music - Almost anything. Don't like punk much as it is too angry.

7. TV Series - For network, "The West Wing". For cable, "The Sopranos".

8. Film - "The Maltese Falcon" hands down.

9. Pastries - Starbuck's apple fritters. Yummy.

10. Coffee - Wait a minute, let me check the label on my IV. OK, Kroger Sumatran Blend. All of the flavor at a reasonable price.

No taggees - just do it if it feels good.